Good Laugh

You know when you laugh so hard that you can't breath and you have to purposefully try to stop laughing so you can catch your breath! Oh euphoria, yes it is as good as the best drugs available. It's only happened to me a few times and this is where I'm gonna write about em.

The last time it happened was believe it or not just a week or two ago. Heather and I were having a glass of wine watching TV, after Kobe had gone to bed. Jack Ass was on and we were laughing at all their stupid antics. One interesting side note is my brother Steve actually went to school in West Chester with some of those guys. Right, you don't care, Anyway... I had seen the movie already, so when they were hiding in the bushes with a camcorder and horn, blowing the horn as the golfers were in their back swing, I wasn't prepared to be surprised. I must have forgotten or maybe it was the wine... one of the golfers got so pissed off, he put a golf ball down and was going to drive it into the bushes where the pranksters were hiding. I cringed waiting for the ball to come sailing in! Just as he was getting set to swing, the horn blew, still trying to make him fuck up his swing, knowing their lives were on the line! I think I may have shed tears, laughing at that one.

Before that was New Years eve in Dacula, GA when Shannon and Jon came to visit. It was a great night of laughter wine and fondue. Heather will never forget Jon eating giant hand fulls of the cheese fondue, after it had cooled into a large gelatinous mass. I remember It was late and we were needless to say inebriated. Jon had told a dozen fascinating stories by now and we laughed routinely at gibberish that seemed to unexpectedly leak out of his mouth. We were playing a mind game called Scategories that I was somewhat familiar with. Well I got some of the rules mixed up. We had been playing for a while and suddenly I got really excited. It seemed I had become brilliantly clever. You see I had forgotten the rule, you could only use one single predetermined letter from the alphabet. We had a list of items such as: things with tails, capitals, fictional character, etc. We had to come up with a word using that predetermined letter. If you used two words with the letter you got bonus points. So for fictional character if the letter was D you could say Daisy Duke and get bonus points. Well in my stupor, having forgotten the rule, I was amazingly coming up with double even triple words for every list item. It was unbelievable, I had words like Lemon/Lime lollipop, Peter Pan, Bread Basket. I couldn't think of any Capitals with any letter of the alphabet, but that was okay because you were bound to have a few that were blank and who cares I was kicking ass! So the timer dings! Oh Oh Oh i want to go first! I have to display my genius, suddenly I'm a victorious superstar... "Uhh, Paul none of those words start with M!" Oh my god I'm an idiot, a complete retard, All I can do is laugh violent tears of despair and humiliation! I laugh so hard recovery is next to impossible ...until finally, completely winded my wife carries me to the bathroom and I go to sleep, hugging the bathtub.

Before that, it was Rochester NY, at Church, in the men's bathroom. We had noticed that one of the girls our age, who was still quite flat chested for a 13 year old had suddenly out of nowhere sprouted some boobies. Well she was one of the guys girlfriend. We were in the bathroom, Andrew, Greg, Craig, Todd and I and we were obnoxiously going on and on about it. He seemed to be pretty happy with the new development, and though it was pretty clear at 14 being a strict church going group of boys, the grave sin that was suggested, He jokingly said, "You know, I don't know, do you want me to check?"
"Yeah," we laughed! But then someone froze dead silent and pointed under the door of the stall. There, there were a pair of black adult Sunday shoes! Some adult was sitting there taking a shit listening to every word we had been saying. Oh no! without another moments hesitation we were out of there. Once out in the hall we could stop and laugh. We felt somewhat safe but it was still nervous laughter and we were too curious to see which adult, or god forbid parent, it was that was squatting in the bathroom. Only moments later the bright red face of Carrie Sickles father emerged from the bathroom. Running partly bent over, half horrified, and completely hysterical with laughter we had to leave the church and hide in the apple orchard until we could get our wits back.